Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
My mom just told me to make sure my face isn't on the front cover of the newspaper on 4/21. Challenge accepted
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
Randomize
