I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Lets get drunk and then you just wraps me into a present because that sounds like fun after the past 3 glasses of wine I drank
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
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