rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Last night was so much fun. i kept trying to lick everyone
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
God doesn't care if you're a paramedic, you can't do that to someones cat and still get into heaven