You can't special order awesome
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
They have beer where we have blood.
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize