I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
We were destined to go to rehab together
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
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