Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
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I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
Want updates from david's night out drinking? If so text back DAVID to this number. Std rates apply.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
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