I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I remember why I come home for the holidays. Sam Adams is the cheapest beer in the fridge
Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I know eh? If a man wants to pay 7 bucks to see some boobies he should be allowed to do so in peace.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when I get back.
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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