you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
i drank out of a bidet.
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
Randomize
