we're blogging at a bar
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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