grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
I think curling is the best thing to watch when you're baked.
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
Randomize