Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize