Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
I puked walking onto the plane. How do you think my post-Birthday hangover went?
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
