Dual....:-)
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
"Nobody needs to know that I have a vibrating butt plug and nobody needs to know that I'm probably gonna start wearing it at work"
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
