I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
His drunken night ended with a "car accident" which really meant he was stuck in a toy car and pushed down the steps.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
DO I FUCKING *LOOK* LIKE SOMEONE WHO HAS THEIR ACT TOGETHER!?!? THE ANSWER IS "NO"!
Randomize
