Texts From Last Night

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  (906): View more from Michigan

  I seriously wish I was FB friends with her

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  (906): I seriously wish I was FB friends with her http://tfl.nu/inkp
  Replies (3) Good night (469) Bad night (957) Order T-Shirt
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  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.

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  (615): I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him. http://tfl.nu/4ib9
  Replies (30) Good night (535) Bad night (2831) Order T-Shirt
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  (585): View more from New York

  He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.

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  (585): He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings. http://tfl.nu/entr
  Replies (15) Good night (768) Bad night (2819) Order T-Shirt
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  (915): View more from Texas

  so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on

  (1-915): View more from Texas

  who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me

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  (915): so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on (1-915): who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me http://tfl.nu/h8za
  Replies (49) Good night (780) Bad night (14849)
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.

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  (443): There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic. http://tfl.nu/18x8
  Replies (31) Good night (1231) Bad night (4897) Order T-Shirt
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first

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  (937): I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first http://tfl.nu/2voj
  Replies (13) Good night (2392) Bad night (1013) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.

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  (917): i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping. http://tfl.nu/d7ey
  Replies (8) Good night (757) Bad night (4102) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.

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  (406): He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana. http://tfl.nu/b27k
  Replies (9) Good night (2935) Bad night (710) Order T-Shirt
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  (406): View more from Montana

  There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!

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  (406): There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go! http://tfl.nu/765a
  Replies (9) Good night (2507) Bad night (691) Order T-Shirt
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  (519): View more from Ontario

  There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.

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  (519): There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway. http://tfl.nu/ij44
  Replies (9) Good night (1703) Bad night (605) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.

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  (518): It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up. http://tfl.nu/6w2h
  Replies (8) Good night (1052) Bad night (1495) Order T-Shirt
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit

  (216): View more from Ohio

  There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.

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  (216): I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit (216): There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash. http://tfl.nu/emo5
  Replies (6) Good night (3160) Bad night (478)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is

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  (610): I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is http://tfl.nu/18uv
  Replies (8) Good night (1541) Bad night (722) Order T-Shirt
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  (556): View more from

  I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.

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  (556): I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk. http://tfl.nu/emsu
  Replies (5) Good night (401) Bad night (1384) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?

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  (609): he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night? http://tfl.nu/gjwh
  Replies (5) Good night (298) Bad night (1196) Order T-Shirt

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