His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I just heard my parents fuck. What. The. Fuck. My rooms right under theirs.. My dad barely even lasted a minute. Im almost ashamed..
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Bought a gym bag tonight. Used it to bring my Taco Bell in the house.
I have never lost more friends than while playing Uno drunk.
Oh god it's open bar.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
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