i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Obama is so hot when he ends wars.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Randomize
