no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
I found a body half wedged into my bedroom wall this morning. How do I explain THIS to the carpenters?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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