But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
