Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
She begged me for sex again. I felt like I was telling a homeless person I didn't have any change.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I have 20 seconds to get my life together and look presentable.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
I wear drunk well.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
