Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
I found someone's tooth on the stairs when I was vacuuming, and my sister found a catheter in the men's bathroom... this cleaning job is dangerous
I just made the pizza guy say helicopter six times in order to get his money. Even he knows how stoned we are.
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize