R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
How long after st. Patrick's day is it ok to shit green before I should seek medicial attention?
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
I would have rather watched a full length video of myself masturbating than heard that.
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.