i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Too bad pet owners lack respect for my training in ancient Buddhist and holistic rehab therapies.
I'm not sure the Buddhist consider pot brownies holistic rehab therapy
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
