What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Abby spilt her vodka all over the train's bathroom floor
WE'RE THE ONES DRESSED UP FOR THE LARGEST DRINKING HOLIDAY IN AMERICA WHO ELSE ON THIS TRAIN IS A SUSPECT FOR THIS SMELL?!
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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