So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
and yes, the jail cell in Citi Field does have a big Mets symbol in it
Then, he just started shoving orange pieces in my mouth as a chaser
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
