Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
new number. flushed my phone last night when i puked, made B help me look for it for 2 hours.
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
