And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
I just want to curl up with him and brush his hair and sing love songs together, I think you should come over and end this
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Randomize
