Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
