don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
hell hath no fury like a questionably-gay best friend scorned
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
True friendship: When you can hold your best friend's hair and still eat your Stromboli at the same time.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
