her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Someone shattered a urinal.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize
