id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
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