Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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