in the middle of sex he stopped to tell me that he loved me... then slapped my ass and told me "back to business"... im gonna marry him
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
If you don't see me at the bar tomorrow night, I was most likely captured by the communists.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Randomize