it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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