I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
We're just Facebook friends. Use guy logic. I tapped your wife in high school, 20 years and 60 lbs ago, when she was hot and experimental. Why would I mess with that now? It would ruin the vivid memories of her that I keep in my spank bank.
I will find you...
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I can’t believe the first text I’m sending you from this phone was about how I just got fingered in a smart car on tin can hill
Randomize
