so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
At Coney Island the sign for the rollercoaster The Cyclone says, "Make sure your glasses and weave are secure."
You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
Bring one of those heart stabber things in case you go into shock. I'll jab you.
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
I need rollerblades now
Rollerblades pick up bitches
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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