make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
smoking weed is really the only logical conclusion to hangovers
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I feel like that needs to be the last time i end a text with "fuck them i love tequila".
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I am just saying if Clark Kent walks into your life, you fuck him
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
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