those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
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