She is in my trunk
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Just did body shot off a midget. Pretty good start.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
