so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
There was a staple in my grits at waffle house last night. My knees are bruised as hell. And I puked pink all over my bathroom. Gooood night.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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