oh god the rape fog is back!
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
Randomize
