i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I opened up her dishwasher and all I found was a spoon, a juice glass and all her sex toys.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Randomize
