Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
i woke up wearing her shoes. this night isn't going on my highlight reel
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wanted to feed hamburgers to the homeless... as a first date... who the fuck is this kid
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
If you need us, Zoe and I will be on my kitchen floor drinking Gatorade and crying
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Wait I'm all alone with a guy and his turtle
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