So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
I am in shape. i keep telling you that.
Round is not "in shape," it's "a shape."
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I just punched myself in the vagina to prove a point. Please pray for me.
Randomize
