i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Washing the last semen-stained shirt you have really solidifies a breakup. It just got real.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he stopped during sex, told me i smelled like McDonald's and went harder..
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
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