i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
I just woke up to a lawnchair covered in lipstick. I'm wearing red lipstick. What happened and is the tequila?
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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