did you get engaged???
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
He sent me a text from across the party that said "your sexy." I just couldn't.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
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