so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
he was extremely fucked up- he thought my sports bra was his boxers. even when his leg wouldnt fit. at least whiskey dick wasnt a problem
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I'm working on a search warrant...can u pick up box of Chardonnay...I'll give u cash when u get here...
Yea... I love that ur a prosecutor and drink box wine
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Randomize
