Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
I know more about this girls vagina than I know about her personality
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
They are going to name an STD after you.
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize
