what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
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It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Mass text to all of my back up boy toys. First one here wins. Mama needs some.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
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And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
How's Vegas?
Woke up with a sculpture of my own head. Been trying to find Ashley for two days. so pretty not too bad.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
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